It makes me sad to think that there are places where customers require a wireless service bell button, or any other kind of alarm, to let someone know that they need a slice of pie or another cuppa joe.
Sad, I tell you. At the Slice of Heaven 24-Hour Pie Shop and Driving Range, we usually know what you want before you do. Of course, that’s often because your second-cousin Darnell has already called ahead and told us that you were on a toot and nothing but some banana-cream pie and a tall latte would bring you back to earth.
But seriously, isn’t that why we are here? Just to make your life a little bit nicer? If we were in it for the money, we’d change the driving-range fees to 10-cents a ball and end our “all you can hit for $10” policy right now. No, no, no. We just want you to relax and know that we are here for you.
By the way, we do not support the Boing-Boing reviewer’s promise to vote for Sarah Palin if she will get behind the concept of the Wireless Service Bell Button. We are, for the most part, yellow-dog Democrats here; at least Sue Ten, Sparkle Junior, and I are. The Morning Guy? We suspect him of being Canadian.
Mark Frauenfelder: “Yesterday, David and I enjoyed fine lunch at a Chinese restaurant in Urbana, Illinois. The experience was made even more pleasant because of this “wireless service bell button” at our table. Note its four buttons: Waiter, Drink, Money (bill), and Chopsticks (food). Each button produced a different tone, which emanated from a speaker in the kitchen. When I pressed the drink button, the waiter appeared in seconds holding a pitcher of ice water. When I pressed the Money button, he came right out with the check.
If Sarah Palin can promise in tonight’s debate that — if elected — she’ll sign legislation requiring all restaurants in the country to install tabletop wireless service bell button systems, she gets my vote.”