Fried Steak in Space

I remember the first argument that I ever had with my ex-husband Pretty Boy Boyd. When I told the twins about it, Chandler said, “You mean you finally told him that you don’t really like Irish music?”

“No,” I replied. “I told him that I fry steak.”

Pretty Boy had almost walked out of my life right then and there, but sadly, he changed his mind, and spent the next several years trying to convince me that the hours it takes to perfectly BBQ a steak Kansas-City style somehow produce a finer meal than the five minutes it takes to drop a fine piece of beef into a super-hot salted skillet and cook it cowboy style.

This past week, a British fragrance firm — Omega Ingredients — reported that it had been contracted by NASA to identify the aroma of space. The results are in, my dear friends, and sure enough space smells like fried steak. (Note: I am not entirely convinced that this news is not a spoof.)

I immediately went to the NASA website to investigate further, but when I typed “fried steak” into the search box, all that came up was the week’s NASA Exchange Cafeteria menu, which sure enough did include a $5.00 Fried Steak Dinner for the week of October 20 to 24.

I know I cannot offer that value for your dollar at Slice of Heaven 24-Hour Pie Shop and Driving Range, but maybe I can offer you a slice of fried-steak pie for supper tonight, but only if you put your order in early. I don’t want to miss the Red Sox on the big screen at The Swing Barn tonight.

But I digress.

As I tried to find the official NASA word on steak in space, I came across a reference to an interesting short-story and video, both titled “They’re Made Out of Meat.” While some say the odor of space is “a high energy vibration in the molecule,” others says this story and video both more fully explain the space-steak aroma phenomenon.

Let me recommend both of these items to you, and I hope you will give me your thoughts on all of this.

Here’s the link to the Terry Bisson story: http://www.electricstory.com/stories/story.aspx?title=meat/meat, and the video is posted below. Enjoy.

Just as a P.S., the number for this post is 666!

4 comments

  1. Marius Maximus says:

    Bah humbug and poppycock! Space does not have a smell. Last time I checked, space was almost completely empty. Ipso facto and carpe diem (and other Latin phrases), that’s why it’s called space, since there is room for so many things.

    An object has a smell when stray molecules – detached from the object – float up into our noses and are detected by the equipment we hide in there. (Keep digging, you’ll find it eventually.) Since space is not a thing, but mostly the absence of a thing, there are no stray molecules and therefore no smell.

    I invite anyone who disagrees with this statement to open a window on the spaceship, stick their head out and try to snort some space. Let me know what it smells like after the maintenance bots reanimate your frozen carcass.

    Bottom line, space doesn’t have a smell and even if it did, we couldn’t experience it. ‘Course, that won’t prevent the perfume houses from trying to sell an Eau de Espace, but any high school graduate really should know better.

    P.S. My number is 668; the beast is my neighbor.

  2. Bjean says:

    Well spoken, or as well as can be expected coming from a being made of meat. But if space DID have an aroma, wouldn’t fried steak be a great one to have?

  3. Bjean says:

    Thank you, Hamazongar, for testing the video-comment section. (Note to self: You get what you pay for.)

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